Photo Rambles
By P.G. Ramblings
The Good, the Bad and the Ugly!

In the glamorous world of wedding photography there are possibly just the two types of professional photographer, and we're not referring to the good, the bad and and possibly even a third... the ugly. What's being discussed here is the traditional type of photographer who keeps his distance and the other who's very hands on and spends the day flirting outrageously with the bride. Of course if he's a real professional, he never forgets to lavish extravagant attention and flattery on the parents, bridesmaids etc lest any jealousy should erupt.

The 'we' being referred to in this 'ramble' are myself and three friends discussing under the influence of many glasses of a rather nice soul warming liquid, the rapidly increasing number of pro-ams that are now appearing on the wedding circuit. More to the point, the discussion revolved around the subject of the professionalism of these guys or as is more likely, the lack of it and hence... the ensuing repercussions.

One of our group had been commenting on the types of wedding photographers he'd encountered over the years and while the rest of us agreed with him that the largest percentage are of the traditional variety, for various reasons, the 'hands on type' are by far the most interesting of the breeds and for the purposes of the discussion, the most worrying for the profession whilst the other lot are...

The former group... the traditionalists... we've all met an example at one time or other... although being fair, there has been one significant change to these dinosaurs over this past couple of years. Pre-digital, they were easily spotted or at least their cameras were easily spotted. Generally speaking they lived by the 'I've got a bigger one than yours' mentality whilst nowadays having been reduced to the within ranks of the masses they've become just another Joe Average (Size unknown but nonetheless irrelevant as ever). Mind you, there still remains one little trait by which they are instantly recognisable... most of them are a cross between an obnoxious movie director and a prima donna complete with attitude problems of gigantic proportions. Any unfortunate guest armed with the latest in digital technology who dares to sneak a shot of the bride and groom... gets eaten alive. Not a pretty sight.... all that blood splashed over the brides wedding dress...

Having gained the confidence of everyone around him and been accepted into the inner circle of the wedding group, the latter of these two distinct breeds of wedding photographer is often not only privy to many hair raising stories and snippets of gossip but is also closer to the action and therefore in a position to capture intimate moments that others can only ever dream about. These photographers live on their wits, each wedding a covert operation, an undercover agent blending in with everyone and everything around him. The army of guests are effortlessly disarmed, secrets are recorded, mugshots captured, the participants in awe of his sleight of hand, the magic of the spontaneous creativity, the outrageous banter, it's another bloodless coup.

If of course such a photographer were to ever overstep the thin redline that separates good natured flirting with sexual harassment or worse... then quite obviously, the photographer hasn't acquired the 'art of the professional' which obviously therefore identifies him... as one of new breed of part time pro-amateurs armed with the latest in photographic toys... the digital camera and photoshop. Armed with such weaponry, every Tom, Dick and Harriet in the world is suddenly a professional photographer operating on the theory (as do quite a number of established pros) that if you take 1000 photographs instead of say... 100... you'll strike gold and capture enough reasonable quality acceptable images for an album. Sadly, in practice it doesn't always work and many of these happy snappers are simply giving 'wedding photography' bad press... not that it had a particularly good one to start with.

Fortunately though, with any luck at all, such cockups can and are usually resolved in or out of civil courts and forgotten about... though never by the bride might it be added. Needless to say, few if any 'fellow' professionals will shed a tear for the plight of the unfortunate not so happy couple and probably... rightly so. After all, if you pay a mere pittance for such a valuable service, you get your just desserts... the photographer from the fire pits of hell which are quite incidentally, fuelled by the countless dire images as produced by this new litter of pro-am photographers.

Ahhh! Here comes that gorgeous brunette with another 4 glasses of the finest of fine malt liquor... I wonder if she's ever considered being a model... perhaps we should enquire....

IndexPage